SHAKESPEARE ON DISK. THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR. ACT I. SCENE I. [Windsor. Before Page's house.] [Enter JUSTICE SHALLOW, SLENDER, and SIR HUGH EVANS.] SHALLOW. Sir Hugh, persuade me not; I will make a Star-Chamber matter 1/1/1 of it: if he were twenty Sir John Falstaffs, he shall not abuse Robert Shallow, esquire. SLENDER. In the county of Gloster, justice of peace and `coram'. SHALLOW. Ay, cousin Slender, and `cust-alorum'. SLENDER. Ay, and `rato-lorum' too; and a gentleman born, master parson; who writes himself `armigero',- in any bill, warrant, quittance, or obligation, `armigero'. SHALLOW. Ay, that I do; and have done any time these three hundred years. 1/1/10 SLENDER. All his successors gone before him hath done't; and all his ancestors that come after him may: they may give the dozen white luces in their coat. SHALLOW. It is an old coat. SIR HUGH EVANS. The dozen white louses do become an old coat well; it agrees well, passant; it is a familiar beast to man, and signifies- love. SHALLOW. The luce is the fresh fish; the salt fish is an old coat. SLENDER. I may quarter, coz? SHALLOW. You may, by marrying. 1/1/20 SIR HUGH EVANS. It is marring indeed, if he quarter it. SHALLOW. Not a whit. SIR HUGH EVANS. Yes, py'r lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my simple conjectures: but that is all one. If Sir John Falstaff have committed disparagements unto you, I am of the church, and will be glad to do my benevolence to make atonements and compremises between you. SHALLOW. The Council shall hear it; it is a riot. SIR HUGH EVANS. It is not meet the Council hear a riot; there is no fear of 1/1/30 Got in a riot: the Council, look you, shall desire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take your vizaments in that. SHALLOW. Ha! o' my life, if I were young again, the sword should end it. SIR HUGH EVANS. It is petter that friends is the sword, and end it: and there is also another device in my prain, which peradventure prings goot discretions with it:- there is Anne Page, which is daughter to Master George Page, which is pretty virginity. 1/1/40 SLENDER. Mistress Anne Page! She has brown hair, and speaks small like a woman. SIR HUGH EVANS. It is that fery person for all the orld, as just as you will desire; and seven hundred pounds of moneys, and gold, and silver, is her grandsire upon his death's-bed (Got deliver to a joyful resurrections!) give, when she is able to overtake seventeen years old. It were a goot motion if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and desire a marriage between Master Abraham and Mistress Anne Page. SHALLOW. Did her grandsire leave her seven hundred pound? 1/1/50 SIR HUGH EVANS. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny. SHALLOW. I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts. SIR HUGH EVANS. Seven hundred pounds and possibilities is goot gifts. SHALLOW. Well, let us see honest Master Page. Is Falstaff there? SIR HUGH EVANS. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar as I do despise one that is false, or as I despise one that is not true. The knight, Sir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door for Master Page. [Knocks.] What, ho! Got pless your house here! PAGE [within]. Who's there? 1/1/60 SIR HUGH EVANS. Here is Got's plessing, and your friend, and Justice Shallow; and here young Master Slender, that peradventures shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings. [Enter PAGE.] PAGE. I am glad to see your worships well. I thank you for my venison, Master Shallow. SHALLOW. Master Page, I am glad to see you: much good do it your good heart! I wish'd your venison better; it was ill kill'd.- How doth good Mistress Page?- and I thank you always with my heart, la; with my heart. 1/1/70 PAGE. Sir, I thank you. SHALLOW. Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do. PAGE. I am glad to see you, good Master Slender. SLENDER. How does your fallow greyhound, sir? I heard say he was outrun on Cotsall. PAGE. It could not be judged, sir. SLENDER. You'll not confess, you'll not confess. SHALLOW. That he will not.- 'Tis your fault, 'tis your fault:- 'tis a good dog. PAGE. A cur, sir. 1/1/80 SHALLOW. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog: can there be more said? he is good and fair.- Is Sir John Falstaff here? PAGE. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you. SIR HUGH EVANS. It is spoke as a Christians ought to speak. SHALLOW. He hath wrong'd me, Master Page. PAGE. Sir, he doth in some sort confess it. SHALLOW. If it be confess'd, it is not redress'd: is not that so, Master Page? He hath wrong'd me; indeed he hath;- at a word, he hath;- believe me; Robert Shallow, esquire, saith he is 1/1/90 wrong'd. PAGE. Here comes Sir John. [Enter SIR JOHN FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, NYM, and PISTOL.] SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Now, Master Shallow,- you'll complain of me to the king? SHALLOW. Knight, you have beaten my men, killed my deer, and broke open my lodge. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. But not kiss'd your keeper's daughter? SHALLOW. Tut, a pin! this shall be answer'd. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. I will answer it straight; I have done all this:- that is now answer'd. SHALLOW. The Council shall know this. 1/1/100 SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. 'Twere better for you if it were known in counsel: you'll be laugh'd at. SIR HUGH EVANS. `Pauca verba', Sir John, goot worts. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Good worts! good cabbage.- Slender, I broke your head: what matter have you against me? SLENDER. Marry, sir, I have matter in my head against you: and against your cony-catching rascals, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol; they carried me to the tavern and made me drunk, and afterward picked my pocket. BARDOLPH. You Banbury cheese! 1/1/110 SLENDER. Ay, it is no matter. PISTOL. How now, Mephostophilus! SLENDER. Ay, it is no matter.. NYM. Slice, I say! `pauca, pauca'; slice! that's my humour. SLENDER. Where's Simple, my man?- can you tell, cousin? SIR HUGH EVANS. Peace, I pray you.- Now let us understand. There is three umpires in this matter, as I understand; that is, Master Page, `fidelicet' Master Page; and there is myself, `fidelicet' myself; and the three party is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter. 1/1/120 PAGE. We three, to hear it and end it between them. SIR HUGH EVANS. Fery goot: I will make a prief of it in my notebook; and we will afterwards ork upon the cause with as great discreetly as we can. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Pistol,- PISTOL. He hears with ears. SIR HUGH EVANS. The tevil and his tam! what phrase is this, "He hears with ear"? why, it is affectations. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Pistol, did you pick Master Slender's purse? SLENDER. Ay, by these gloves, did he- or I would I might never come 1/1/130 in mine own great chamber again else- of seven groats in mill-sixpences, and two Edward shovel-boards, that cost me two shilling and two pence a-piece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Is this true, Pistol? SIR HUGH EVANS. No; it is false, if it is a pick-purse. PISTOL. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner!- Sir John and master mine, I combat challenge of this latten bilbo.- Word of denial in thy labras here; Word of denial:- froth and scum, thou liest! 1/1/140 SLENDER. By these gloves, then, 'twas he. NYM. Be avised, sir, and pass good humours: I will say "marry trap" with you, if you run the nuthook's humour on me; that is the very note of it. SLENDER. By this hat, then, he in the red face had it; for though I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. What say you, Scarlet and John? BARDOLPH. Why, sir, for my part, I say the gentleman had drunk himself out of his five sentences,- 1/1/150 SIR HUGH EVANS. It is his five senses: fie, what the ignorance is! BARDOLPH. And being fap, sir, was, as they say, cashiered; and so conclusions passed the careers. SLENDER. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter: I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with those that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves. SIR HUGH EVANS. So Got udge me, that is a virtuous mind. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; you hear it. 1/1/160 [Enter ANNE PAGE, with wine; MISTRESS FORD and MISTRESS PAGE.] PAGE. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink within. [Exit ANNE PAGE.] SLENDER. O heaven! this is Mistress Anne Page. PAGE. How now, Mistress Ford! SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well met: by your leave, good mistress. [Kisses her.] PAGE. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome.- Come, we have a hot venison-pasty to dinner: come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness. [Exeunt all except SHALLOW, SLENDER, and EVANS.] SLENDER. I had rather than forty shillings I had my Book of Songs and Sonnets here. 1/1/170 [Enter SIMPLE.] How now, Simple! where have you been? I must wait on myself, must I? You have not the Book of Riddles about you, have you? SIMPLE. Book of Riddles! why, did you not lend it to Alice Shortcake upon All-hallowmas last, a fortnight afore Michaelmas? SHALLOW. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. A word with you, coz; marry, this, coz;- there is, as 'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here. Do you understand me? SLENDER. Ay, sir, you shall find me reasonable; if it be so, I shall 1/1/180 do that that is reason. SHALLOW. Nay, but understand me. SLENDER. So I do, sir. SIR HUGH EVANS. Give ear to his motions, Master Slender: I will description the matter to you, if you be capacity of it. SLENDER. Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow says: I pray you, pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his country, simple though I stand here. SIR HUGH EVANS. But that is not the question: the question is concerning your marriage. 1/1/190 SHALLOW. Ay, there's the point, sir. SIR HUGH EVANS. Marry, is it; the very point of it; to Mistress Anne Page. SLENDER. Why, if it be so, I will marry her upon any reasonable demands. SIR HUGH EVANS. But can you affection the oman? Let us command to know that of your mouth or of your lips; for divers philosophers hold that the lips is parcel of the mouth. Therefore, precisely, can you carry your good will to the maid? SHALLOW. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her? SLENDER. I hope, sir, I will do as it shall become one that would do 1/1/200 reason. SIR HUGH EVANS. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must speak positable, if you can carry her your desires towards her. SHALLOW. That you must. Will you, upon good dowry, marry her? SLENDER. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your request, cousin, in any reason. SHALLOW. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz: what I do is to pleasure you, coz. Can you love the maid? SLENDER. I will marry her, sir, at your request: but if there be no great love in the beginning, yet heaven may decrease it upon 1/1/210 better acquaintance, when we are married and have more occasion to know one another; I hope, upon familiarity will grow more contempt: but if you say, "marry her," I will marry her; that I am freely dissolved, and dissolutely. SIR HUGH EVANS. It is a fery discretion answer; save the fall is in the ort "dissolutely:" the ort is, according to our meaning, "resolutely:"- his meaning is goot. SHALLOW. Ay, I think my cousin meant well. SLENDER. Ay, or else I would I might be hang'd, la. SHALLOW. Here comes fair Mistress Anne. 1/1/220 [Enter ANNE PAGE.] Would I were young for your sake, Mistress Anne! ANNE PAGE. The dinner is on the table; my father desires your worships' company. SHALLOW. I will wait on him, fair Mistress Anne. SIR HUGH EVANS. Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the grace. [Exeunt SHALLOW and EVANS.] ANNE PAGE. Will't please your worship to come in, sir? SLENDER. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am very well. ANNE PAGE. The dinner attends you, sir. SLENDER. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth.- Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, go wait upon my cousin Shallow. [Exit 1/1/230 SIMPLE.] A justice of peace sometime may be beholding to his friend for a man.- I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother be dead: but what though? yet I live like a poor gentleman born. ANNE PAGE. I may not go in without your worship: they will not sit till you come. SLENDER. I' faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as though I did. ANNE PAGE. I pray you, sir, walk in. SLENDER. I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruised my shin 1/1/240 th'other day with playing at sword and dagger with a master of fence,- three veneys for a dish of stew'd prunes; and, by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot meat since.- Why do your dogs bark so? be there bears i' th'town? ANNE PAGE. I think there are, sir; I heard them talk'd of. SLENDER. I love the sport well; but I shall as soon quarrel at it as any man in England. You are afraid, if you see the bear loose, are you not? ANNE PAGE. Ay, indeed, sir. SLENDER. That's meat and drink to me, now. I have seen Sackerson 1/1/250 loose twenty times, and have taken him by the chain; but, I warrant you, the women have so cried and shriek'd at it, that it pass'd:- but women, indeed, cannot abide 'em; they are very ill-favour'd rough things. [Enter PAGE.] PAGE. Come, gentle Master Slender, come; we stay for you. SLENDER. I'll eat nothing, I thank you, sir. PAGE. By cock and pie, you shall not choose, sir: come, come. SLENDER. Nay, pray you, lead the way. PAGE. Come on, sir. SLENDER. Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first. 1/1/260 ANNE PAGE. Not I, sir; pray you, keep on. SLENDER. Truly, I will not go first; truly, la; I will not do you that wrong. ANNE PAGE. I pray you, sir. SLENDER. I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome. You do yourself wrong, indeed, la. [Exeunt.] SCENE II. [Windsor. Before Page's house.] [Enter SIR HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE.] SIR HUGH EVANS. Go your ways, and ask of Doctor Caius' house which is the 1/2/1 way: and there dwells one Mistress Quickly, which is in the manner of his nurse, or his try nurse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and his wringer. SIMPLE. Well, sir. SIR HUGH EVANS. Nay, it is petter yet.- Give her this letter; for it is a oman that altogether's acquaintance with Mistress Anne Page: and the letter is, to desire and require her to solicit your master's desires to Mistress Anne Page. I pray you, be gone: I will make an end of my dinner; there's pippins and seese 1/2/10 to come. [Exeunt.] SCENE III. [A room in the Garter Inn.] [Enter FALSTAFF, HOST, BARDOLPH, NYM, PISTOL, and ROBIN.] SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Mine host of the Garter,- 1/3/1 HOST. What says my bully-rook? speak scholarly and wisely. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of my followers. HOST. Discard, bully Hercules; cashier: let them wag; trot, trot. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. I sit at ten pounds a-week. HOST. Thou'rt an emperor, Caesar, Keisar, and Pheezar. I will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw, he shall tap: said I well, bully Hector? SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Do so, good mine host. HOST. I have spoke; let him follow.- Let me see thee froth and 1/3/10 lime: I am at a word; follow. [Exit.] SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Bardolph, follow him. A tapster is a good trade: an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a wither'd serving-man a fresh tapster. Go; adieu. BARDOLPH. It is a life that I have desired: I will thrive. PISTOL. O base Hungarian wight! wilt thou the spigot wield? [Exit BARDOLPH.] NYM. He was gotten in drink: is not the humour conceited? His mind is not heroic, and there's the humour of it. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinder-box: his thefts were too open; his filching was like an unskilful singer,- he 1/3/20 kept not time. NYM. The good humour is to steal at a minim's rest. PISTOL. "Convey" the wise it call. "Steal"! foh! a fico for the phrase! SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels. PISTOL. Why, then, let kibes ensue. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. There is no remedy; I must cony-catch; I must shift. PISTOL. Young ravens must have food. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Which of you know Ford of this town? PISTOL. I ken the wight: he is of substance good. 1/3/30 SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about. PISTOL. Two yards, and more. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. No quips now, Pistol:- indeed, I am in the waist two yards about; but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife: I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation: I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be English'd rightly, is, "I am Sir John Falstaff's." PISTOL. He hath studied her well, and translated her well,- out of 1/3/40 honesty into English. NYM. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass? SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. Now, the report goes she has all the rule of her husband's purse:- he hath a legion of angels. PISTOL. As many devils entertain; and, "To her, boy," say I. NYM. The humour rises; it is good: humour me the angels. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. I have writ me here a letter to her: and here another to Page's wife, who even now gave me good eyes too, examined my parts with most judicious oeilliades; sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly. 1/3/50 PISTOL. Then did the sun on dunghill shine. NYM. I thank thee for that humour. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning-glass! Here's another letter to her: she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be cheaters to them both, and they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go bear thou this letter to Mistress Page; and thou this to Mistress Ford: we will 1/3/60 thrive, lads, we will thrive. PISTOL. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become, And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take all! NYM. I will run no base humour: here, take the humour-letter: I will keep the haviour of reputation. SIR JOHN FALSTAFF [to ROBIN]. Hold, sirrah, bear you these letters tightly; Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.- Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hailstones, go; Trudge, plod away o' th'hoof; seek shelter, pack! Falstaff will learn the humour of the age, 1/3/70 French thrift, you rogues; myself and skirted page. [Exeunt FALSTAFF and ROBIN.] PISTOL. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd and fullam holds, And high and low beguiles the rich and poor: Tester I'll have in pouch when thou shalt lack, Base Phrygian Turk! NYM. I have operations in my head, which be humours of revenge. PISTOL. Wilt thou revenge? NYM. By welkin and her star! PISTOL. With wit or steel? NYM. With both the humours, I: 1/3/80 I will discuss the humour of this love to Page. PISTOL. And I to Ford shall eke unfold How Falstaff, varlet vile, His dove will prove, his gold will hold, And his soft couch defile. NYM. My humour shall not cool: I will incense Page to deal with poison; I will possess him with yellowness, for the revolt of mien is dangerous: that is my true humour. PISTOL. Thou art the Mars of malecontents: I second thee; troop on. [Exeunt.] SCENE IV. [A room in Doctor Caius' house.] [Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY and SIMPLE.] MISTRESS QUICKLY. What, John Rugby! 1/4/1 [Enter RUGBY.] I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my master, Master Doctor Caius, coming. If he do, i' faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God's patience and king's English. RUGBY. I'll go watch. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. [Exit Rugby.] An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tell-tale nor no breed- 1/4/10 bate: his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: but nobody but has his fault;- but let that pass.- Peter Simple you say your name is? SIMPLE. Ay, for fault of a better. MISTRESS QUICKLY. And Master Slender's your master? SIMPLE. Ay, forsooth. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a glover's paring-knife? SIMPLE. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a little yellow beard,- a Cain-colour'd beard. 1/4/20 MISTRESS QUICKLY. A softly-sprighted man, is he not? SIMPLE. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener. MISTRESS QUICKLY. How say you?- O, I should remember him: does he not hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait? SIMPLE. Yes, indeed, does he. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell Master Parson Evans I will do what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish- [Enter RUGBY.] RUGBY. Out, alas! here comes my master. 1/4/30 MISTRESS QUICKLY. We shall all be shent.- [Exit RUGBY.] Run in here, good young man; go into this closet:- he will not stay long.- [Shuts SIMPLE in the closet.] What, John Rugby! John! what, John, I say! Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt he be not well, that he comes not home. [Sings.] And down, down, adown-a, etc. [Enter DOCTOR CAIUS.] DOCTOR CAIUS. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys. Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet `un boitier vert',- a box, a green-a box: do intend vat I speak? a green-a box. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Ay, forsooth; I'll fetch it you.- [aside.] I am glad he 1/4/40 went not in himself: if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad. DOCTOR CAIUS. `Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m'en vais a la cour,- la grande affaire.' MISTRESS QUICKLY. Is it this, sir? DOCTOR CAIUS. `Oui; mette le au mon' pocket: `depeche', quickly.- Vere is dat knave Rugby? MISTRESS QUICKLY. What, John Rugby! John! [Enter RUGBY.] RUGBY. Here, sir. DOCTOR CAIUS. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby. Come, take-a 1/4/50 your rapier, and come after my heel to de court. RUGBY. 'Tis ready, sir, here in the porch. DOCTOR CAIUS. By my trot, I tarry too long.- Od's me! `Qu'ai-j'oublie!' dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for de varld I shall leave behind. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Ay me, he'll find the young man there, and be mad! DOCTOR CAIUS. `O diable, diable!' vat is in my closet? Villain! `larron!'- [Pulling SIMPLE out.] Rugby, my rapier! MISTRESS QUICKLY. Good master, be content. DOCTOR CAIUS. Verefore shall I be content-a? MISTRESS QUICKLY. The young man is an honest man. 1/4/60 DOCTOR CAIUS. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet? dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet. MISTRESS QUICKLY. I beseech you, be not so phlegmatic. Hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from Parson Hugh. DOCTOR CAIUS. Vell. SIMPLE. Ay, forsooth; to desire her to- MISTRESS QUICKLY. Peace, I pray you. DOCTOR CAIUS. Peace-a your tongue.- Speak-a your tale. SIMPLE. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to speak a good word to Mistress Anne Page for my master in the way of 1/4/70 marriage. MISTRESS QUICKLY. This is all, indeed, la; but I'll ne'er put my finger in the fire, and need not. DOCTOR CAIUS. Sir Hugh send-a you?- Rugby, `baille' me some paper.- Tarry you a little-a while. [Writes.] MISTRESS QUICKLY. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been throughly moved, you should have heard him so loud and so melancholy.- But notwithstanding, man, I'll do you your master what good I can: and the very yea and the no is, the French doctor, my master,- I may call him my master, look you, for I keep his 1/4/80 house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself,- SIMPLE. 'Tis a great charge to come under one body's hand. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Are you avised o' that? you shall find it a great charge: and to be up early and down late;- but notwithstanding, to tell you in your ear,- I would have no words of it,- my master himself is in love with Mistress Anne Page: but notwithstanding that, I know Anne's mind,- that's neither here nor there. DOCTOR CAIUS. You jack'nape,- give-a dis letter to Sir Hugh; by gar, it is 1/4/90 a shallenge: I vill cut his troat in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy jack-a-nape priest to meddle or make:- you may be gone; it is not good you tarry here:- by gar, I vill cut all his two stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to trow at his dog. [Exit SIMPLE.] MISTRESS QUICKLY. Alas, he speaks but for his friend. DOCTOR CAIUS. It is no matter-a ver dat:- do not you tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself?- by gar, I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine host of de Jarteer to measure our weapon:- by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page. 1/4/100 MISTRESS QUICKLY. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well. We must give folks leave to prate: what, the good-year! DOCTOR CAIUS. Rugby, come to court vit me.- By gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out of my door.- Follow my heels, Rugby. [Exeunt CAIUS and RUGBY.] MISTRESS QUICKLY. You shall have- An fool's-head of your own. No, I know Anne's mind for that: never a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven. FENTON [within.] Who's within there? ho! 1/4/110 MISTRESS QUICKLY. Who's there, I trow? Come near the house, I pray you. [Enter FENTON.] FENTON. How now, good woman! how dost thou? MISTRESS QUICKLY. The better that it pleases your good worship to ask. FENTON. What news? how does pretty Mistress Anne? MISTRESS QUICKLY. In truth, sir, and she is pretty, and honest, and gentle; and one that is your friend, I can tell you that by the way; I praise heaven for it. FENTON. Shall I do any good, think'st thou? shall I not lose my suit? MISTRESS QUICKLY. Troth, sir, all is in his hands above: but notwithstanding, 1/4/120 Master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a book, she loves you.- Have not your worship a wart above your eye? FENTON. Yes, marry, have I; what of that? MISTRESS QUICKLY. Well, thereby hangs a tale:- good faith, it is such another Nan;- but, I detest, an honest maid as ever broke bread:- we had an hour's talk of that wart:- I shall never laugh but in that maid's company!- But, indeed, she is given too much to allicholy and musing: but for you- well, go to. FENTON. Well, I shall see her to-day. Hold, there's money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf: if thou see'st her 1/4/130 before me, commend me. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Will I? i' faith, that we will; and I will tell your worship more of the wart the next time we have confidence; and of other wooers. FENTON. Well, farewell; I am in great haste now. MISTRESS QUICKLY. Farewell to your worship. [Exit FENTON.] Truly, an honest gentleman: but Anne loves him not; for I know Anne's mind as well as another does.- Out upon't! what have I forgot? [Exit.] ACT I. END.